Vslash's Xanga

X-entry 32 - TX Hold-em vs. Holding Up in TX

Thu, 04 Oct 2007 06:57:25 GMT

life's been pretty busy lately.

not that anyone really cares....but i'll touch on some recent happenings.....

my dad's bloodline jumped into the next generation for the first time almost a week ago. my sis popped out a little sweet angel baby girl. not knowing the sex of the baby makes for some great excitement (in addition to the standard fact that new life is probably the coolest thing that goes-down on this planet). i'm so proud of/happy for my sis and her husband and little Natalie. all of them are so blessed...and so fortunate....i wish them all the best. it's exciting times...

i won the 8-person-Wed-night poker match tonight for the second week in a row. that's been a lot of fun and pretty sweet on the funds (no matter if i have to hand them over for rent right after winning them). the hands dealt to me would be the main factor in my success...my luck will probably run-out next week. but that's cool too...because it's a lot of fun...and a simple pleasure of mine. games are fun...the fellowship is always a bonus too. it kinda feels bad to win in such a game though...but in the long run...the money probably just circles around...so it's pretty balanced. and balance in "the force" is good (light-sabers would make it a lot cooler though)

i also got a definite date for the first day of shooting this little film some friends are doing. i went and shot some scenes for a trailer a couple of years ago that was to get them a demo for their idea. so they're finally getting around to doing the actual movie now...starting here at the end of this month. it should be fun. i like the people i'll be working w/...and my first scene is driving some people to a country club, parking the car (off screen), getting a bit intoxicated, and leaving the club. i think i can manage all that. the character i play is supposed to be a pretty strung-out kinda guy....and i've been type-cast into the part.

work is better now that i have some relief. i see things getting better there...even if they have to be crazy for a bit in order to get "there" - i have positive vibes about it...and that's cool...because generally there is negative energy that usually comes w/ The Job and The Man. it's still just 'work' - but it's 40 hours of my week (my time)...so i'll always continue to try to make the best of it. if i don't do that...i'll start looking at the toaster and the bathtub in a different light

i have bills/debts coming to an end soon. i can't explain how sweet that seems to me at this point. now if i can just quit smoking on top of that...i'll be rich. not really....but i'll have some nice extra cash-flow which will naturally make things better in the material world. as for the spiritual world...i hope that is getting better too....i think it might be. sometimes the 'flesh' just seems so strong to us (well...to me). even if we can see how weak it really is...like on the guy who just had a tire blow-out on his crotch-rocket doing about 125 down the interstate.

i'll be getting my car out of the shop soon. a friend has been working in Cally for about a month-or-two and let me borrow his 'ride' while he was gone. that was a big help...and i hope to get my car in a matter of days. i really really need to make some well overdue roadtrips/visits that i've fallen behind on w/out a car. i might break-down on the way to those places...but that's cool....my car and i have been through that before. it just better be careful now days...cuz it being paid off might motivate me to light it on fire and dance around it like a crazy tribal man....and then go look for a new car payment w/ it's ashes rubbed all over my body (and maybe some 2nd degree burns).

that's about it. there's a lot more...but no one cares. just some 2:30am ramblings for my journal.

Music:

Iron & Wine new CD release "The Shepherd's Dog" (video link not from new album...but one i think is a cool video...even if it's not my favorite song)

Eddie Vedder solo record for the soundtrack to a Sean Penn directed movie "Into the Wild" (which i can't seem to find showing in ANY theater...but do have access to the book)

Dave Matthews & Tim Reynolds finally put out another acoustic-duet CD

Guster (that's for you RockThisB)

Joni Mitchell "California" [in her prime]

nothing new from me on the music front...but got some things in the works currently that might get worked out.....

V/ a.m.

X-entry 31 - how did this turn into a 9/11 post?

Tue, 11 Sep 2007 15:01:47 GMT

i've had a fascination w/ "church signs" since about 1997. i guess the first one that i can recall would be NEED A LIFEGUARD? WE'VE GOT ONE THAT CAN WALK ON WATER. seeing that let me know right away that someone had ordered some "cheese" and that it had been delivered. i did not, however, know that these signs would become a menu for ordering "cheese" for the rest of my roadtripping life....one on which we could easily stop to get some nachos.

some have made me shake my head side-to-side and laugh through the years w/ ones such as GOD ANSWERS KNEE-MAIL or THE MOST POWERFUL POSITION IS DOWN ON YOUR KNEES (a dirty mind can take this one the wrong way). and maybe they try to 'play' on a dirty mind when they put up a SWALLOW WHEN YOU WANT TO SPIT to connect w/ those dirty-minded folks...so maybe it’s actually trying to get them to think about what it's really saying? i mean...o f c o u r s e this one is about holding your temper back and/or not acting out in anger (aka: love not war/forgiveness)...right?....yeah...that's it. they might get some of that same crowd w/ a HAPPY HOUR HERE EVERY SUNDAY sign out front...i've seen that one too. they 'play' on words a lot in these signs. the ever-famous use of "sun" vs "son" like w/ EXPOSURE TO THE SON MAY PREVENT BURNING or something along the lines of SOULED OUT!....yeah...they get clever A FAMILY ALTAR CAN ALTER A FAMILY...hmmm...and not so clever.

the signs are popular enough these days that many sites can be found on the web that are dedicated to "church signs" along w/ sites that even have "church sign" generators...where you can create your own saying and input it onto a picture of an actual church sign....neat, eh? i've even seen huge billboards on the interstate these days. you've probably seen them. the ones w/ the modern-day God quotes (ones which are not in any religious text) like "DON'T MAKE ME COME DOWN THERE" -GOD. the idea of God buying ads on a billboard is also slightly amusing. maybe God is in marketing, and Jesus took over management from Him 2000 years ago...because i've seen a few signs out in front of churches that said UNDER THE SAME MANAGEMENT FOR 2000 YEARS...and this has been on more than one occasion.

i tend to joke about these signs....but i like these signs also because they can be like modern-day parables for me sometimes...seriously....to help me to stop and think about life along my way. a sign might simply say PRAY or something like FORGIVE...and those never hurt...maybe even a REPENT wouldn't hurt to see every-now-and-then either. and even when it does come w/ a little cheese....i can still dig it. for instance...one currently down the road from me reads GOD WANTS SPIRITUAL FRUITS NOT RELIGIOUS NUTS. i sincerely like this one...cheese and all. and maybe it's fitting for today's Sept 11th date. because the "church sign" movement has been known to 'play' on holidays and certain times of year...w/ signs around Christmas time that say SANTA CLAUS NEVER DIED FOR ANYONE or Easter's NOBODY LAID EGGS FOR YOUR SALVATION (or EASTER IS MORE THAN SOMETHING TO DYE FOR)....and i'm s u r e Halloween has many good ones that i can't recall at the moment.

but back to the "religious nuts" sign - yeah...i'd say that sign might be a 9/11-themed sign strategically put up for this week. there was definitely a brand of "religious nuts" that made quite an impact on the world back on that day in 2001. i believe this date is now even a national holiday here in the USA...Patriot Day or something like that. the media/government definitely help us to "never forget" that day. it's like i still hear 9/11 referenced daily here six years later....and the actual "anniversary date" - wow...that really gets the 9/11 fire stoked up each year. i'm by no means trying to down-play those "horrific events from that day" - but i do also know that it is just ONE of MANY events throughout all of history where religious radicals have been motivated to commit similar acts. religion is probably the all-time leading cause of death around the world....and our history is full of it. that sign and/or this day is just another reminder of how religion can be used to justify some way-out-of-whack things....even awful things….world changing things.

to try to come back around to the topic of this post....i guess i could say that religions are like church signs in a way. as in they can be as cheesy as they want...because that's not hurting anyone....and if they make people stop/think from time-to-time...then that's even better. now....if i were to start seeing signs out in front of churches that said something like KILL JEWS LIKE THEY KILLED JESUS.....well then....i would at least know where the "religious nuts" were hanging out. i also know to stay away from a place w/ a HARRY POTTER IS GOING TO HELL sign out front

i won't mention any specifics here. but i've heard/witnessed (in my opinion) some pretty cheesy beliefs in my day. the popularity of some of these amazes me. they can be broken down through religions, sects, denominations, cults....whatever classification we want to give it (blue cheese, swiss cheese, cottage cheese). some of them may be hooked on a man who is currently preaching at their local church or maybe someone who has recently written a book, some may still go by doctrines of a man who started a church 60 years ago, some may choose to be part of a religion founded by a man 180 years ago (on the 22nd of this month), and some may follow a man who taught about a “way” to live over 2000 years ago. for the most part...all of these people tend to be chilled out and going about their personal spiritual journeys while not harming anyone else. so i'm cool w/ that...and i'm cool w/ those people…no matter how cheesy i might think their beliefs are.

w/ that said.....they can put up a SOUL FOOD SERVED HERE sign anytime they'd like for all i care...or if they really want to make me think...they can throw up the THERE ARE NO ATHEISTS IN HELL sign out front. however, they should also know to not leave the movable letters on the sign to where they are accessible to me...because i may be tempted to rearrange the letters on their GIVE SATAN AN INCH AND HE'LL BE A RULER - SUNDAY WORSHIP 9:00AM. because i could rearrange that to be I LOVE Y0UR HUGE PANDA ASS AND TW0 MINI BALLS (not using the letters HNERNA9CAERH: or the ’ ) i don't know what that means...but it's a possible change that could be made

that's it....

may [insert your God here] use you as an instrument of peace.....

V/ pre-noon

X-entry 30 - Updates on X-entry 29's Subjects [$arcasm warning]

Tue, 07 Aug 2007 11:16:25 GMT

ramblings w/ nothing really to ramble about....

WORK:

work is still busy w/ "fulfilling" The Man's needs...and wishing the clock would move faster. i get paid Friday...and i need it...badly. i had to borrow $20 from a friend Saturday so that i could have some $$$ to my name. i bought a pack of smokes ($5) and then paid the pool tournament entry fee ($10) - but i won all that back and more w/ a first place win that night. only one image can describe it....THIS. i really wish the weekly winner got a WWF-style-heavy-weight-champion-belt for winning that tournament...that'd be cool....as long as Macho-Man Randy Savage doesn't jump out from behind a dumpster, kick my @ss, and take it from me....but...that'd be pretty cool too.....especially if he said "step into a Slim Jim" after he was finished ChuckNorrisin' my @ss.

NEW ROOMATE:

the cat is still here. tried the CatNip kitty-drug thing the other night w/ her...but i swear that cat is always high...so i really couldn't tell any difference in her normal trippy behavior. she caught a cricket...and she was at least smart enough not to kill it right away so that it would still be capable of jumping around the room...this way she could have her fun w/ the chase/hunt part of that game for a little while. cats definitely have a "puppy" stage...but at least that doesn't involve p*ssing and sh*tting on the floor....but it does require a smack or two every now/then.

i hope that i don't have to kill her and tell people that "she ran away" (people usually don't seem to get as emotional about that one) - j/k - i have a bit of heart i guess...so she'll probably live. but don't let her get rabbies....cuz i'll Old Yeller that pussykitty real quick (for everyone's well being).

THE ARTS:

notta. low on creativity. high on laziness. content w/ boredom. none of these three things are good for the arts. maybe a sh*tty poem/song or two...but that's about it. i'm sure my recent stools have been more creative than anything else i've been producing lately...and powerfully moving.

MY MULL:

RockThisB's little emo-sis chopped away at it Friday night. it's better....but not as good as RockThisB's sweet new 2002 do. (it's really 2004...but that doesn't flow as good when you say it). i thought the mullet was providing me w/ some kinda power...but i was wrong....actually some of the laws of physics have been making better sense to me lately (seriously)...and Camaros don't seem as cool to me these days either....but...Sammy Hagar is kinda cool to me now....i can't figure that one out. maybe it's just his personal brand of tequila that i've shot-down-my-pipe here recently...hmmm...i hope that's it. cuz THIS....just ain't cool....or this.

THE WEATHER:

it's finally feeling like August. it's been pretty toasty (w/ a breeze) the past few. played free golf today. played free golf on Saturday...but i have to pay someone back for that round. i'm still sucking pretty good...but keeping my frustrations down. maybe smacking balls around the country-side works those frustrations out naturally. maybe a few f-bombs here/there...but those too are natural from me when i'm out there on the links...or when i'm talking about someone's mom.

ANNOYANCES:

i'm trying to think of anything that has annoyed me other than the cat lately. can't think of much really. drunk people kind of annoy me. i mean...they can be entertaining for a good bit and all...but there is a point at which some people need to shut it off or just get knocked out (for their own good). sometimes i really wonder why alcohol is legal and other forms of gettin-your-buzz-on are illegal. even i have been drinking a bit here lately on the weekends...so i have some inside-info on the stupor...i mean...i wasn't man-humping another man's face out on the dance floor or riding around w/ drunken-red-necks emotionally singing bad songs until my voice was horse...but i probably said too much at some points...and slept w/ a couple of my friend's wives (j/k...but some people actually use that as a legit excuse for their drunken choices)

still on page vii of the book The Ultimate Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. it's been in my bed w/ me the last few nights...but i've haven't given it any 'play' - but it hasn't really scratched my back either.

V/ a.m.

X-entry 29 - The Ulitmate Hitchhiker's Guide to Work & Back

Wed, 01 Aug 2007 03:02:42 GMT

i started out this Xanga blog thing w/ a post about my grandmother who we called Ganga. well...today would have been her birthday. i'm not sure how old she would have been here in 2007. she died when i was a freshman in high school (1993) and when i graduated a friend of hers gave me a picture of her toasting up a wineglass to the camera's view. i love that picture. it made me cry that day. i still have it and toast up my glass of wine (or something comparable) to it on special occasions. so "cheers Ganga" - happy birthday!

i haven't posted anything in sometime. here's some highlights of my boring world.

WORK:

some changes have occurred at work to where i'm currently doing my regular daily duties plus those of someone no longer employed there. those just happen to be even more BS than my normal bs...so that's been busy. it's never been a permanent place for me. i'm really not made to work on making sure that "the Man's" ways of making money run smoothly. one day (hopefully sooner than later) i will move on. i've learned a lot of "things" working there over the years. however, i've also wasted a lot of brain space on pointless information of the ins/outs of that place that i will not fully realize until i'm actually removed from it. until then it's punch-in/punch-out and pay bills...some of which are nearing their end.

NEW ROOMATE:

some friends of mine rescued a kitten on the side of the road about a month ago. they are moving back to TX at the first of Aug (which starts tomorrow) and told me that they would take it back at that time if i wanted them to do so. i told them if i fall in love w/ her during her stay w/ me that i would keep her. i'm really not sure about that at this point. she did kill a centipede crawling across the floor the other night....so maybe she can keep little creatures off of me and out of my room from time-to-time. she likes my nostrils a lot and cleans out my ear holes every-now-and-then when i let her....but that may just not be enough for her to stay. her turning off the power button on my surge protector (including my computer) about 5 minutes ago when i was in the middle of trying to write this post didn't help our relationship. a friend from work is going to bring me some "Cat Nip" tomorrow...she said that the cat will be fun to watch when it's high on that. i'll do that...then i'll probably just let her go ;-(

she did bring up an old memory. if you watch this clip and it brings back memories that you had long-forgotten from your youth....then you'll understand. if not, then you're not in my generation...or you just didn't watch a lot of television when you were a kid.

click here: Dumbo's Circus (note: y*utube clip)

THE ARTS:

i opened my mouth and volunteered to run lights/sound for the summer musical at the community theater across the street for a friend who was directing the show. i really have never liked musicals at all. i've been in a couple that i hated. but this one was not a "serious" musical...and i realized that the fun ones like this one aren't as bad. they were doing Little Shop of Horrors. anything w/ a huge plant singing and eating people can't be too serious. it was the time taken out of my last two weekends of doing my loser-life norm weekend stuff that sucked the most....but that show is now over....and i can't say that i'll miss it so much.

MY MULL:

i need a haircut pretty badly. my mullet is now actually growing it's own mullet. someone asked me if i had a "rat tail" the other day. that same person got their vintage New Kids on the Block t-shirt stolen and i have sported that b*tch twice already. it's mine....and so is my mullet's mullet until i get it cut which will hopefully be soon. i've noticed my head's resemblance w/ recently purchased Beatles albums (along w/ their staches), comedic wigs sported by Adam Sandler, and my nightly dreams of Neil Diamond

THE WEATHER:

it's rained like a mo-fo here lately. so much that the four free 18-hole golf passes i got from work at the first of the month were almost worthless. i really thought that i was never going to have a dry day to play. but we did that yesterday under the storm clouds and in the humid heat that made for a stuffy ride home. i used my sister's clubs (not my good golfer sister....sorry LLL) and they were shorter than my normal set. so my stance looked like i was in the "taking a steamer" position to get down lower for my swing....and....it gave me another excuse for sucking so bad. not as bad as RockThisB...but he had the "it's my first time to ever play" excuse...which is a pretty damned good excuse in the game of golf. that...and his testicles get in the way w/ that huge tumor in there (booyah).

ANNOYANCES:

that's about it. i’ve never read any of the books…but i sure know that the new/final Harry Potter book is out...and i've realized a few of my friends/folks are "into" that series a good bit....but @#$%....they don't worship it. i feel like ranting about the "Christian" (generally fundamentalist types) that are so anti-Harry Potter....but this post is long enough already. however, in the meantime, anyone that is one of these types...feel free to send me a message if you feel the need to quote some Deut 18:9-12 or to convince me that JK Rowling is the anti-Christ......and i'll reply to it w/ my thoughts (along w/ cast a spell of made-up-magic/fictional sorcery on you....so beware).

i just don't read much fiction period...but i have heard a lot about the book The Ultimate Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams from people trying to tell me about fiction that i might enjoy reading. i've had it for a few days and have made it to page vii

V/ (pre-midnight)

X-entry 28 - Take off your shoes...this ground is HOLEY

Sun, 24 Jun 2007 19:14:32 GMT

so i went to yet another concert friday night. it was probably my 4th or 5th show of the year to attend. this one was in Dallas w/ John Mayer headlining the show and Ben Folds performing in the supporting role. Brett Dennen also played early in the evening. it was raining before the show...but the grass wasn't wet at the show...so apparently it didn't rain there. i think i'm through w/ fighting traffic and putting up w/ annoying people at concerts only to have seats so far away from the action. i'm going to make a pact w/ myself that i will not attend another concert at some huge arena/stadium unless i have some good seats....it's just not worth it.

we could only hear bits of the last song of Brett Dennen's set as we walked toward the arena....but never actually saw his carrot-headed/sesame-street-voice havin' self. Ben Folds came out and i feel that the venue was just too large for his play....or they just didn't have him turned up enough. one funny note was when he played his cover of the rap song B*tches Ain't Sh*t....i don't think some of the teeny-boppin John Mayer fans' parents were ready for such a tune. we saw one young girl's mother doing the "ear muffs" thing to her daughter....the lyrics are of course pretty raw in that song....but it's supposed to be comedic....don't think too many non-Ben Folds' fans there understood that point of the show. but...you can't expect them to get it....

John Mayer came on and he sounded good volume/level wise. he really didn't need to have on that black v-neck shirt...but hey....i'm sure all the annoyingly-hyper young girls and mo-douche-hawk sporting bags were digging it. we had to get away from our position in the middle of the lawn right before J.Mayer came on for fear that the annoying teeny-bopped girls behind would get up and started dancing and cool-puffing on their cigarettes. we found the sweetest location atop the lawn area on the wall. this area wasn't a sweet-spot due to the high traffic area of being the pathway of everyone going to get beer and visit the piss-pots...but then again it was. as we approached our new vantage point we saw a lady laid out on the ground laughing. i thought at first she was just drunk and had fallen down. but we soon realized that there was a grass-grown-camouflaged HOLE in the ground that she had stepped into and busted her big @ss. we spent the rest of the night standing there watching people fall in that hole over-and-over-and-over-and-over-and-over-and-over-and-over again. it never got old. it was great. it was the best part of the entire evening. i know it's wrong....but people tripping, stumbling, falling, and even twisting ankles all night was humorous to us....call us evil. especially the people holding a to-the-rim-full-beer in each hand, people w/ a hand full of nachos, people drunk-dancing as they walked w/ the music, people on their cell phones, etc. pregnant ladies or ladies carrying babies should have been warned more....and the powers-that-be should have let more of the douche nozzles fall (they seemed to luckily step over the hole too often).

so...that's about it. getting joy out of other people's downfall ended up being the best part of the show....i don't know what we would have done w/out it

V/ afternoon

X-entry 27 - The Name Game

Wed, 23 May 2007 17:00:55 GMT

what's in a name?

i know about 3-4 ladies that i pretty much see on a daily basis who are all prego. so...names have kinda been a theme around me lately. some (like my sis is currently doing) keep the sex of the baby classified from themselves. i think it's pretty cool to not know...it just makes that moment even THAT more exciting. i got to hear all the ladies in the delivery room hoop&holla from my vantage point in the waiting room when my other sister's son was born. the doctor never was 100% on him being a boy/girl...so he ended up being a surprise....and it was a lot of fun. so....maybe you do have to come up w/ a few more names than those who do know what they're having. but most people should probably have a back-up name for the other sex...just in case...because ya just never know. i know my cousin had to improvise on-the-spot w/ a name (as well as get out the blue paint) when his "girl" came into the world packin-a-penis it's probably also better to keep the name you are planning to yourself. sure...people are more honest/harsh w/ their true "opinions" about a name that has yet to be put on the birth certificate....but....who cares what they have to say about the name you have chosen (and/or are thinking about using)? they-can-say-what-they-have-to-say "to the baby's face" when he/she comes out….as you hand them your daughter for the first time...introducing her as T9C

anyway....people have different "tastes" and/or philosophies when it comes to names for their kids. some people like to go old-school using a family name all grandpa-style...like Ralph or Richard (aka: Dick). or maybe after grandma....Nadine or Nancy. often they'll even go back so old-school to the Old Testament days and throw an Adam, Asher, or an Abraham out there. some people are more into the new-school names like Atreyu or Affleck. some stay traditional w/ Michael or Mary. some think they're cute/creative w/ a Jessika, a Jakob, or a Jayson. some like to go w/ just the initials and call him "BJ" for Benjamin Joel. or use variations of names like Chuck for Charles (which has serious consequences when kids sing the "bananna-nanna-foe-fanna-fa-fee-fie-fo-fanna" song). like w/ anything. there's different-strokes-for-different-folks regarding the choosing of names.

there are also many conflicts that can arise when going through the baby-naming-process. some names are almost restricted due to certain language/culture variations w/ popular names like Jesus or Adolf. moms can't name their daughters after "that str*pper/b*tch that slept w/ my boyfriend in college" (no matter how much their husband likes the name Alexia). for the same reason dads won't name their sons after some daytime soap opera dude's name like Rod or Rex (no matter how hot/mysterious their wives think that he is on the show). parents also often feel that they need to be careful w/ any names that can easily be used as puns/rhymes or to "make-fun" of their kids....like Kermit, Marvin, Lester, or Harry. in addish, some people's last names can strongly influence what the first name can/cannot be. like...people do actually have the last name Hunt and need not name their son Michael and let him be called Mike.....due to the MikeHunt rule it's also probably not too safe to name your son Matt Matthews, Marcus Mark Marx, Luke Lucas, or Jonathan John Johnson.....just for the simple fact that they will be destined to be douche-bags

i personally have a standard formula name w/ a first/middle/last name format.....BUT....all three names happen to be very usual "first names" (non-personal-example: Arthur Samuel Scott) - this can be a problem w/ people filing your records at the hospital, school, or 1-hr photo labs. they seem to just pick a name to use for my "last name" and it can take them 3 or more tries to find my file. also note here that the example name of "Arthur Samuel Scott" would also give one the initials "ASS" - which is another problem area people have to be aware of

in conclusion, i like when people name their kids what they want to name them. it doesn't matter what i think or what other people think about the name selection they've made for their child. plus...names can always be changed if need-be. for example.....some dude's name out there was Timothy McVeigh before he blew up a building in Oklahoma City…and I’m sure there were some Jeff Dahmer’s who changed there names after all his acts were revealed to the world and that name became notorious through the media coverage.....AND…there's bound to be someone named Clay Aiken out there right now who has "had enough" and is currently filling out the name-changing legal paperwork as i type this

i think that it's also a good idea to let your kid "go by" their middle name (this is the case w/ me). sure....there are some minor problems/confusion at times throughout the years. however, i ALWAYS know when a bill-collector or tele-marketer is trying to contact me....because they always say your actual "first name" when they're on the hunt…so they’re easier to dodge

i’m also looking for a new last name for myself…so if anyone has a cool one they’d like to share w/ me….i’m listening. i’d prefer an easy-to-spell/easy-to-say name that is fit for a rock star or a Scientology-devoted movie star

V/ midday

PS: i also have to note these two names that people i know have recently used for their children: Corduroy and Stihl.

X-entry 26 - The Five, Six, & Seven

Mon, 07 May 2007 02:54:28 GMT

so today is May 6th 2007. it's a 5 - 6 - 7 date. just numbers in line...but cool....like an eclipse that comes around every now and then....ya know....when it all lines up just right. these numbers make me think of one thing...my favorite part of the New Testament...Matthew chapters 5, 6, & 7. that's an account of Jesus' Sermon on the Mount - which i think covers just about everything that needs to be covered for "living" this life here w/ each other. it's a good chunk of solid "red print" (in those particular Bible versions)....so it's hard to miss when thumbing through the pages looking to see where/what all Jesus was to have said.

like i've said before...i have many "issues" w/ my personal faith and seem to remain on a neverending search for where/how all of these teachers/prophets/messengers from these different worldwide religions fit into the one big master-plan. a plan that i do actually have faith in...which is a plan that i feel is a Holy one.....and definitely one. however, i dig everything that i have to go by and the materials that i have read about Jesus and His teachings (enough to capitalize that "H" in "His") i think it's pretty solid....a lot of truth....unarguable principles....and a very important piece to the master plan's puzzle. if Jesus was somehow G - d in human flesh....then that's even cooler....and would undoubtedly make Him THE most important man to have ever walked the Earth (along w/ many other important peeps that have been part of the plan)....but that would definitely separate Him from the rest.

Matthew 5, 6, & 7 just covers it all. i actually just now deleted all of what i just wrote in pointing out some of my favorite parts of this sermon...because it ended up seriously being pretty much the entire sermon w/ all the quotes i had posted. so...to say the least....i recommend it. i figure anyone can of course read those chapters whenever they'd like for themselves...and not have to post it all here. it probably doesn't take more than 10-minutes. it's a good "read" to just read through and meditate on...or whatever someone wants to do w/ it. it consists of a lot of good question marks "?" as well as periods "." to help search inside of yourself....and outside as well.

i wrote a new song the other day. it's a Jesus-themed song...so i'll post it here. beware of the fact that i just turned on the mic and recorded a little live sample here in my not-so-empty room so it's a pretty raw/fresh recording. the title, lyrics, and music are still in the process of being worked out. but this is it so far.....

H-spot (click [here] for audio)

i've played A through G...still looking for the H-spot...i take another shot...but i can't seem to reach it

i heard it's the perfect place to be...but i can't figure it out...w/ all my Thomas doubts...because i can't see it

why do i have to touch the wounds? why do i have to go check the tomb?

because all i find is an empty room...what good does that do?

it's an empty room...i thought i needed proof.

in this empty room...where i'm the bride-less groom. i'm so empty too

so why don't you marry me? marry me...marry me

well i guess i do...have to say "i do" too

i've read it A to Z...all the numbers the prophets count...the Sermon on the Mount...it's my all time favorite speech (yeah)

i heard He's the perfect man to teach...w/ turning the other cheek...loving enemies...but we don't practice what He preached (no)

even though He wore these wounds...even though He'll be coming soon...be ready and keep

an empty room...keep on watching

from an empty room...He's returning...

He's prepared the room...the only Bridegroom...and so holy too

so why don't you marry me? marry me...marry me

well i guess i do...have to say "i do" too

late april 2007

that's about it for now. yesterday was Cinco de Mayo (i really don't know what that means) - tomorrow is the Damien Rice show (w/out Lisa) - my car has been broken down for about three weeks (thanx to car-pooling...haven't really needed that P.O.S.) - the truth is always right (however, often times i think we're better off not knowing some secrets) - the weather has been wild (but thankfully not yet living up to any of the hype that recent storms here have brought to the people/media) - i was 27 years old (now i'm 28) - i needed to get a hair cut this weekend (before the mullet completely takes over) - i'd rather not be where i am (but i don't know where i'd rather be) - Saw Spiderman 3 today (it sucked something fierce) - i don't believe that the "revelations" of Joseph Smith were divine in nature (i'm open to discuss this w/ any Morman willing to convince me otherwise)

okay...that's it

V/ p.m.

X-entry 25 - Words/Words - good 4 ur heart - the more ya eat - the more ya f...

Fri, 06 Apr 2007 07:00:27 GMT

my 25th post...an anniversary type-number. just celebrated a 7-year old's b-day and a 7-year anniversary at work all this week. this post is long...it's gonna be the last one for awhile as i need to take a 'spring break' from this Xanga-thang....so it can take up and/or waste some space on here for awhile. i was only going to do 25 total posts when i started this thing................we'll see...........i'll probably be back. i've got a b-day to celebrate coming up soon....i might just end up being too old for all this after that hits

let me start out by saying that words and i have a love/hate relationship. i do love words. i love to "play" w/ them and read/hear other people do the same. it's just a necessary factor in how we communicate w/ one another for the most part and/or express ourselves a lot of the time. reading is cool...but i honestly never read books. those so called "deep" conversations are cool....but the right words are often never found or don't exist to be able to fully articulate so many things that we are forced to leave out.

so really...actions, i guess, are more of "where it's at" than the use of words - all those things that need no words to express. like...just being there to hold someone else as you hear their word-less cries or in a "moment of silence" among a large crowd where everyone's word-less thoughts are focused on something/someone in particular. paintings are cool...photography is cool...music is cool....no words. actually planting a seed and watching a tree grow is cool...eating the fruit it produces is even cooler. hearing or reading about such an event/experience is not as insightful or fulfilling. babies don't use words...but they sure let you know when something's not cool w/ them. they can't tell you the exact details....but that's your job...you'll figure it out eventually....even w/out any words

see/feel the _____ come up in the morning...drink/taste the _____ flowing in the stream...inhale the _____ blowing around your being....there....a wordless trinity keeping are fleshy carcasses alive

the no-need-for-words policy is what's so cool to me about talking/praying to God. there's no need to try to find the right words to explain what you are trying to say....God's got it.....God gets the point....God knows where you're coming from....you can't BS God (like we do in job interviews and annual reviews). sure...you can talk in word-less tongues...but what's the point in that? - silence will probably get the job done. somewhere alone in that "secret place" [see Matthew VI] Jesus talks about is probably even better. i think that back in the Old Testament days people didn't even write/say a word/name for "God" because they knew that there was not a word/name that could be given to the I AM [see Exodus 3:14]. i think they even had vowel-less names like YHVH or YHWH that they would not pronounce. they're probably right....we all should probably not try to give the "what was...what is...and what is to come" any kind of label w/ word(s) and such....because It's really not possible.....and probably not too cool

[note: i abused the word "cool" above intentionally to articulate points in a simplified manner...and due to my lack of vocabulary...i left off some of my other favorite choice 4-letter words]

but words are necessary....no doubt. and since we have to use them...let's do...and let's be careful w/ our approach. words can be powerful (especially when accompanied by music). no matter what your kindergarten teacher told you about sticks and stones breaking bones but words not hurting...he/she was using a little "play" on words in their own right to express how powerful they are not....whatever....words can kick some serious @ss i want to mention here how 'sarcasm' strongly needs a grammatical punctuation in this English language we use. if people don't have a sarcastic interpretation when reading a lot of the things that i write or when listening to me yack....they're gonna be lost....possibly even highly offended

anyway...i didn't want to rant w/ words about words using words here i just wanted to maybe give some examples of some different folks "playing" w/ words that i kinda dig (see below) but my own apparent "issues" w/ words got in the way and i shat out a bunch of them up above.

RockThisB and myself have been co-working on writing/recording a new song the past few days and it's been a lot of fun "playing" w/ words and trying to be careful w/ our speech. careful....because it's a comedic song and we don't want this particular subject to offend anybody by hitting a little too close to home.......even literally "hitting too close to home" some things just aren't funny to some folks.....even if they are funny

[note: i'm linking a few hyper-links to some videos below if you ever get a chance to check them out...i think they're each entertaining]

hope the vids don't get removed by that y*utube site at some point.

1) tonight i came across a video of someone named Scroobius Pip when looking up some y*utube videos. i went on to check out his mysp*ce page as he seemed like someone who had a lot to say, who liked to "play" w/ words, who was sarcastically articulate....and was quite humorous in my opinion (the British accent was a plus ). click <HERE> to see a video of his "Thou Shalt Always Kill" - i don't know anything about him other than the brief things i saw/heard tonight. so if he kid naps children and/or beats up on old people on the side....i'm sorry for giving him some props

2) his beard, attire and rap-like rhythmic ranting kinda reminded me of the Hasidic Jewish reggae/rapper Matisyahu. i think he may even be making fun of Matisyahu to some degree w/ that song. i like Matisyahu for the most part. i've seen him in concert and was even bumpin' one of his CDs on the way home from work yesterday. even if some of his words/rhymes are a bit cheesy...i still like his "play" w/ words (and he uses a lot of them). he's not so much full of humor...more spiritually/religiously related lyrics (which i also like about it). you may or may not be familiar w/ his music. although he has some other good/less-mainstream tracks that i dig....i like his "King W/out a Crown" song performed live at Stubbs in Austin, TX. click <HERE> for a video of that. since he's old-school Jewish....he uses "Hashem" which means "The Name" - rather than actually saying "G - d" in his songs (to relate to my God/words part of the word-rant above).

3) speaking of Stubbs in Austin. i saw Ben Folds there a few months back (he rocked that b*tch) and will see Ben Folds again w/ John Mayer in June (i'm stoked). i've come to really dig Ben Folds these past couple of years. i like his sense-of-humor w/ his songs and his words are generally pretty dry/blunt.....and funny. some of his new tunes are some of his best work in my opinion. he has a newer song called "All You Can Eat" that you can check out by clicking <HERE> if you don't have any problems hearing a couple of fitting F-bombs dropped....and the word sh*t once.

back to 'words'…a lot of Christians really like to Gospel of John…they like to "read" it and "quote" it a lot….pretty fitting i guess, since it starts out w/ words about "The Word"

In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.

The same was in the beginning with God. All things were made by him; and without

him was not any thing made that was made. In him was life; and the life was the light of men.

4) w/ that mentioned…<HERE> i’d like to link to Ben Fold’s "Jesusland" video…i think it’s a great song and makes some good points…w/ words….about how man messes up this "Word" that's being talked about - it can hit home…and bring up things that need to be pointed out.

you can also click <here> to hear a rap-type-religious-themed song that i wrote over some of RockThisB and his two bro's music back in the day. it's another one of my attempts at "playing" w/ words as well. it was the first song that we all collaborated on...so it's a fond memory of mine. plus it's Good Friday and Easter weekend....so it's a fitting song.

5) hell...why not....click <HERE> for one of my favorite videos from my first music "love" from back-in- the-day....Pearl Jam...they never were big on music videos...but their video for "Do the Evolution" is pretty rockin' in my opinion....and is another "shot" at mankind.....which is good....we don't need to take it too easy on ourselves

V/ a.m. enJoy the spRing ~n peAce

PS: i updated the sample of my new Rabbits song from the previous post to now be another sample (after the same tracks were put through RockThisB's computer) where the levels/quality are a little better.

PSS: RockThisB should post some of his solo-work on Xanga...it's safely/legally got the circled-c...so why not? i take that back...it would make my tunes sound even more like sh*t....so forget i said anything.

X-entry 24 – Tell Me About the Rabbits George (w/ song post)

Tue, 03 Apr 2007 15:38:50 GMT

i’m gonna post a new song here that i was working on last month a little bit. one that RockThisB was kind enough to come over last night and throw down a rough-draft guitar track on (in addish to my crap-draft guitar and vocal track). thanks again Bagness…hope you don’t have any ‘issues’ w/ me posting this. i hope we can put some more to this song and maybe get FunkD to tap out some beats on it at some point in the future. i emailed him this sample last night…so maybe he can form some ideas in his head that he can beat-off next time he’s in town….yeah….i said “beat-off” maybe you could even ‘master’ it over at your HouseOfTunes at some point.

i bought this digital track recorder a year or so ago and have only used it a handful of times. it has some good points….but….for the most part…..it blows. my POS computer and soundcard are from before the turn of the century….and my mix-down of this ended up pretty quiet…but I think we can maybe all get an idea of where it’s headed….which may just end up being in the recycle bin on my desktop.

i’ve really been lacking inspiration so far this year and haven’t been creating too much of anything. my mind sure has been spending a lot of time in the briar patches down all those bunny-trails of the mind…..so this song is just a quick trip down one of those trails.......

this song is titled Rabbits – the word ‘”rabbits” always reminds me of the book/movie/play “Of Mice & Men” – where George’s mentally-challenged brother Lenny always asks him to explain the details of their utopia w/ his almost constant request of…. “tell me bout da rabbits George…tell me….tell me….tell me bout da rabbits” – in one of the final scenes George tells him about the rabbits for one last time and then blows his head off (out of love) this song is by no means based on that….but I think the Lenny character may have some issues w/ fuzzy little animals (as well as the ladies) similar to mine….he just wanted to pet them soooo bad

<<<audio>>>

rabbits

i don’t think she understood

not one string of words i said

but she’s so damn pretty

she’ll be the needle to my thread

it’s not: what if i could?

it’s as easy as when and where

but she’s just a cool cover

on that book i’ve never read

but it’s on my shelf / she’s on my shelf

while I’m out chasing the rabbits

down these bunny trails

oh…these rabbits

puff of smoke….and the rabbits

there’s more to the show….than these rabbits

it’s all a joke….all these rabbits

she walks in front of me

as we head back up my stairs

a peek of that sweet little heaven

w/ that body that she wears

and I think: maybe i should

but I know it’s: don’t you dare

there’s no need to discover

what you already know is there

because it’s on your shelf / she’s on my shelf

but i don’t need more habits

to feed the fire for myself

oh…these habits

puff of smoke….and the habits

there’s more to the show…than these habits

it’s all a joke….all these habits

V/ lunchtime

X-entry 23 - Headache Mythology

Fri, 30 Mar 2007 12:34:27 GMT

are headaches for real? i hear people almost daily talk about their headaches. i hear of these massive "headaches" called migraines. i see commercials for "tension" headaches. it's headache this / headache that. what's wrong w/ you people? what is this pain that you are feeling in your heads? is it some confusion/frustration between your physical brain and your metaphysical mind...to where you "think" of pain - so it's there...or...is there an actual pain in there that is "pounding" on your noggins in some form/fashion?

i have never in all of my years had these "so called" headaches of which i hear so much about. when i was six-or-seven years old something happened to me one night where i lost a period of time (i think i rode off and wrecked my bike) and my brain felt like it was loose in my head for the next day or so. apparently i took some blow to the skull that night...which would explain the memory loss. i also remember my head hurting the next day and feeling a bit spacey for a period of time (i probably had a concussion to some degree). but i wouldn't classify that as one of these standard "headaches" - since i F'ing took a head-shot from something......bike wreck or alien abduction.....who knows? that is the only time/event that i can recall my head ever aching (besides a baseball-to-the-temple once and those sharp-quick pains that i feel a few times each year). headaches.....hmmmmmm???

maybe headaches are like the hiccups. can't those be cured by getting them scared out of you or just by putting your mind on something else and forgetting them away? i only hear of a few cures for the headaches. there's the "sugar pill" called Tylenol ---&--- the head/back/foot rub (or the "other" thing(s) i've heard of to cure a headache)....and that sounds like some good medicine {insert: Al Green's "Sexual Healing"}

in addition to the usual term-of-endearment "sh*t head" - i have also been called hard-headed (both the figure-of-speech and literally) quite a few times in my lifetime. and i'll give out a heads-up on the fact that i will probably go w/ a head-butt if you ever were to get into a physical confrontation w/ me.....so be ready to dodge that other than those names given to my head....it seems like a pretty normal head. i've never been called a numb-skull......well.....maybe a couple of times.

w/ all of this hype i hear about headaches and w/ me never having one....i'm now in fear that my day is coming....and all of that pressure that others have been releasing w/ headaches through the years....i feel that mine will just build up to a point where my head finally explodes. however, probably not.....the likelihood of you headachers all being liars is probably the better bet

really though....i'm not a headache denier. i believe in them. i believe all of you for the most part. because i do know it's always there to pull out of the excuse-to-leave-work-early bag of going-home-for-the-day tricks....which i can't use because i've got those "stomach issues"...ya know and if some lovely lady needs help getting rid of one of these headaches and asks for my assistance....sure....i'll even restrain myself to just the head/back/foot rub

i'm sure there are others out there like me whom have also never had a headache. i honestly feel for you peeps w/ these on-going headaches. some say and/or get tattooed across their sets of knuckles that "life is pain" - but pain is also a b*tch and that sucks for you headachers. good luck w/ that. maybe they can take my brain and the other non-headacher brains after we are dead/gone and study up on them to help out the future....by stopping people from having headaches....which will probably directly help out the problem of over-population to some degree well….now that i think about it….it seems like i have heard of the "headache" being used as an excuse NOT to do that….hmmmmm…..so it may just balance that out.

[note] i can't comment w/ any further details about what the aliens put into me when i was six, or when she said that they would be returning here for my follow-up tests and their other plans.....due to the personal attacks by the government on me and my family members

V/ a.m.